Posts Tagged ‘fears’

How much responsibility do you take for how people treat you? Who’s fault is it when others “do you wrong?”

Boy,that’s a lot to swallow. So let’s break it down. Assuming that we all were born and raised with the same background,same family history and same social and economical advantages,it would be also safe to assume that we all held the same regard when it comes to our ideas on how we treat others,the difference between right and wrong and where our moral and ethical loyalties lie.
If this were the case,each of us could accept without provocation that what happens to us is a direct result of something we’ve done. That we are the cause of what effects us. Right? We alone hold the key to how are lives turn out. That there is no such thing as luck. There is no such thing as fate. There is no such thing as Karma. But that we alone by what we say,do,how we act or react determines our outcome in life. Is that something you can live with? Can you or would you be willing to take personal responsibility for everything in your life?

I know what you’re thinking. You’re thinking that you are a responsible person. You are a hard-working,caring,compassionate individual that goes above and beyond for everyone. If everyone else would just do what they’re supposed to do,you could enjoy life stress free, be successful and embrace your full potential.
Well guess what? You assumed wrong!!

We are not all apples from the same tree. We haven’t all shared the same family history,advantages,disadvantages,blessings or tragedies. We are not all the same.   And with that firmly established it’s reasonable to say,we are “Created equal,differently.” Most people will argue that we cannot avoid what happens to us. How can we be responsible for unprovoked hostility, undeserving maleficence or downright mistreatment and abuse from others when there’s no way we would cause harm to ourselves? 

The truth of the matter is,in many ways we are the problem. Now before you start getting upset and start reasoning that bad things happen to good people all the time,that there are legitimate cases where people are victims and the innocent are wrongly convicted, I want you to think only about this: How many times have you heard an abuser say of their victim “They asked for it.”? or How many times have you heard someone say “It’s not my fault,I’m not to blame.”? This is an example of someone not taking personal responsibility for what they’ve done to someone else. In our world,everyday,the innocent,the victims, the one’s suffering are being held responsible for what happens to them by the ones that are doing the harm. The robber is blaming the person being robbed!

In the beginning I asked you “Who’s fault is it?” when others do you wrong. And I’ve played devil’s advocate by subtly insinuating that the root of all that’s evil comes from within you. Like it or not,different or the same,one thing remains constant: We,you and I,are responsible for maybe not everything that get’s thrown in our way but whether we allow it to stay. We choose the ideas that motivate the steps we take towards either walking into or away from what could hurt us. Define yourself by accepting that 99.9% of who you are today is a direct result of the choices you make 100% of the time.

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Everything comes with a price-especially greatness.

One of the most difficult things to accept is that with every great thing there is suffering. Either the suffering is yours or it belongs to someone else.

It’s the balance of life. It’s the sacrifice of the universe. It’s the Joy and the pain of the world.

And though we may want  or desire the treasures of happiness we cannot ignore the inevitable balance, that consequence exist.




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One of the worst thing a parent can do is compare themselves to another parent, especially a celebrity parent. We see it more than ever now, celebrities toting their children—some biological, some adopted—as their latest accessory. It can be very easy for us ‘everyday’ parents to find ourselves wondering  just how they manage to have the glamorous lifestyle and still have the kids in bed by nine.

blogs.babble.com/famecrawler/tag/angelina-jolie-brad-pitt-and-kids/Let’s stop fooling ourselves. Many of these parents have way more help then we do. It’s unfair to compare ourselves with the rich and famous. They have round-the-clocknannies and the best that money can buy. Surely the pictures we see of them at the park strolling hand-in-hand with their well-behaved children are a far cry from the pictures we never see of them: frustrated, tearing their hair out with up-all-night babies and crazed teenagers. Even still, if we’re not peering into the lives of the onscreen June Cleavers we still may find ourselves a little curious as to how other parents handle the odds-and-ends of parenthood.

The truth:  It’s such a waste of time and effort to constantly try and follow the latest parenting trends. What works for one family doesn’t always work for another. Each family is different. Each child is different, and each parent—mom or dad—has a different idea of what’s best for their child. I remember feeling a little uncomfortable when other parents would talk about the awards their child was receiving at school when my child was struggling. I felt the heartache and self doubt when my methods of parenting wasn’t giving the results I was hoping for. I felt that pain. I felt as if I had let my child down and myself down. So I stopped and “got back to scratch” (i.e., made a fresh start). I developed these simple rules for “Getting Back to Scratch:”

  • Trust – Self doubt is a parent’s worst enemy. You have to trust in yourself and keep in mind you will make mistakes.
  • Keep an open mind – Holding on to generational parenting ideas can sometimes hinder a parent. Instilling culture is a must but it’s okay to accept some of today’s new modern approaches.
  • Forgive – When I say forgive I’m talking about forgiving YOURSELF. It’s easy to become overcritical of ourselves especially if we’re too busy comparing.
  • Stick to what works – Like I mentioned before, doing what works for your family is the essence ofgood parenting. Maybe you do homework right after school, maybe you do homework after everyone’s had dinner and settled down. Either way is right as long as it works for you.
  • Share – Don’t be a hero. Share the responsibility of parenting with trusted family or even friends. When you need a break, ask for one. Create a blog or web page where you can share ideas with other parents around the world, explore your similarities and just vent if you have to.
  • Divide and Conquer – If the problem is the kids won’t listen, the rooms aren’t getting clean, homework’s not getting done, etc., pick one thing and focus on that first. Then move on to the next issue.

There’s nothing glamorous about being up all night changing diapers and telling a teen twenty times to clean their room. But there is something to be said about a parent who listens to his/her family’s needs and creates a custom template for raising her/his child. In fact, it makes for a fabulous parent!

View original post @http://lenaweegreatstart.org/blog/2012/09/12/how-do-you-measure-up/

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Good Morning Fall.
This morning I was reminded that Fall is very close by. A small rust colored leaf peeked through this summer’s heat beaten planks searching for it’s place. It seemed to ask “Is it time?” I would answer, “Yes,my friend,it is about that time.”

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Thank you for letting me go. Thank you for letting me down. Thank you for breaking your promise that you will always be around. Thank you for lying and misleading me. Thank you for trying and trying to convince me that you were the one for me. I thank you from all the way down to the bottom of my heart.I thank you for reminding me that you played a part, a part in my never ending search for the one who was created to hold on to my heart ♥

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Many people have dreams,but some rarely live them. Instead they talk about them,pray about them,make wishes about them never ever achieving them. If you want your dreams to come true the truth is you have to work for them. Like a normal job you have to put in the blood, sweat and tears for them. If you actively pursue your dreams 8 hours a day like your clocking into work and devote your energy and thoughts into them they have no choice but to come true. The problem is for many that’s just not possible. Life has got in the way. Life has become so hard and so demanding that its a struggle to live our dreams. That’s why when we see people living their dreams we become frustrated and angry. We personalize others peoples acheivements because we know how passionate we are about out our own.We call people who pursue their goals “selfish”. But really are we not selfish in NOT pursuing our goals. If we have a gift or a passion to share with the world is it not our obligation to focus on enriching the lives of others with the gift that has be given to us  from birth? Pursuing anything but your talents and diffusing the flame that burns inside ones soul is death. Every day we wake to the same thirst. The desire to be happy and free. Lifes pursuit. Yet everyday we find a reason not to. Responsibilities,kids,careers,disabilities that we use against ourselves instead of for ourselves. Dreams are like the solid non moving ground we all long to stand on while spinning out of control on the merry-go-round of life. We see it,but we are to afraid to jump. To afraid to stop and get off. Instead we crawl closer to the middle and close our eyes praying and hoping someone will save us. Until we demand from ourselves,train our minds to follow our instructions and lead our lives purposefully we will find ourselves old and Grey regretting we didn’t try harder. Quit running the rat race and start knocking down walls. Become obsessed with living out your dreams today and stop putting them off for when you have more time,more money or less responsibility. Your life is the reflection of how much work you put into it. Start putting into life what you want to see come out of it.Start now.

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